Late Nights

When we lived in London I spent a lot of time staying up late alone in my room, on my laptop or occasionally opening the window to smoke a cigarette. I could spend those hours working quietly or wasting away time online shopping or reading articles or whatever I wanted. 2AM wasn't late at all then, and there were days I literally didn't go out or see any sunlight.

Later on I had much earlier hours to keep but the more I dreaded going back to the office the next morning, the later I stayed up. This made me more tired and feel worse the next day. It's been going on for years and I care less and less what people think of me nowadays but I still wonder what it really means to live and work from this space I inhabit, this human form, that is more like a cave on certain days.

There are so few things to believe in you just end up spending all your time obsessed with them and ignoring everything else...