The idea of life being a united, singular and ongoing event isn't really working out for me. In the city I feel like things keep happening and taking me along with them, especially compulsions to escape what is my real life that are growing stronger and stronger. Even my legitimate responsibilities are also a kind of diversion, or evasion from something which would supposedly be more real. It creates a real confusion where I can't tell what is important and what isn't anymore. And it seems to be getting worse as the lines of reality blur in my experiences and I don't know what is and isn't, anyway.